He's going to know

If you've ever talked to my husband he might have told you that I was the worst person to date. Somehow that man braved the storm and still manages to stick around. That really has nothing to do with anything other than one very interesting thing I learned about Jeff while dating/not dating him -- he hardly has any sense of smell.

Don't get me wrong, if I burn dinner or if there is a very strong smell he'll eventually smell it, but really it's just weird how little he can smell. I've been telling him that for years. Whenever I say there is something wrong he just tells me I have super human smelling powers and my sense of smell is weirder than his lack of smell. We have sort of been at a smelling standoff.    

One day I got a call from Jeff. He had finally gone to the doctor. He had completely lost all smelling ability, and I think the guy was really just tired of  me giving him a hard time about it. I thought he'd go in, get a few prescriptions and be on his way.

The conversation started with him telling me he had something up his nose that had to be removed. Um, up your nose?  I started to laugh, like a crayon? When my cousin was little she shoved a red crayon up her nose, for my BIL it was a lima bean. But Jeff is 40. You would think he would know better than to have anything up there that didn't belong.

Turns out it isn't a crayon or even a lima bean, but there are several things he's going to need to have done to the inside of his nose. When we finally met with a specialist, the doctor told us it would be a three hour surgery. On a nose? How much can you do up there -- ha ha that sounds gross. Oh and hello, if anyone gets a three hour surgery on their nose it should be me. I have the pictures of the nose I want; cut me open doctor I'm ready.

I wondered if they offered a fix one get one free. The doctor had no sense of humor, it was awkward.   

A few tests here and there and then Jeff will go in, have everything fixed and the doctor thinks he just might be able to smell like a normal person. Yay Jeff.

This is all well and good until I woke up in the middle of the night with my heart racing and I suddenly realized, he just might be able to smell me! Holy smokes, what if I stink? What if no one has told me and I just didn't know I've smelt bad all these years? I have decided I better go buy some perfume. I haven't worn that stuff since Mr. No-Smell came along.  I don't even know what perfumes are out there, I wonder if they even sell the kind I use to wear. 



Brooklyn wears some sort of body mist, Malibu Beach or something like that. Jeff can't smell it (of course) but I think it's more geared for tweenagers. Maybe smelling like a beach is better than my smell. How can I have gone this long without worrying about my smelliness? I wonder if he'll be disappointed when he can finally smell and realizes that he was lucky not to smell. It will take a few weeks for the sense of smell to come in after the surgery. In the meantime any suggestions on a good smelling perfume?